stress.....hell......hurt.....(read if you care)

4 min read

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ZachMFKAttack's avatar
Published:
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so...................how can i explain how i feel rn? i feel pain.....heart break.......empty. and its not even online related......

so i just got word from drivers ed, that not only did i miss the exam by a few questions........but i also missed a scheduled drive that i never got info of, because of my fucking partner.

now my father did his best to calm me, said he'd help me get through this whole thing.......my mother........takes my devices away (for a month mind you).........is now limiting my privileges..........and calls me a dumb kid. she tried sugar coating it but i knew what she meant (dont tell me otherwise).

and as i said above, yes, shes taken my devices away for a month. and not even to teach me anything she said.....this is to simply hurt me for this small mistake i made. id rather pay the 50 bucks for it with my birthday money than to give up my contacts and DA for this. i wont be able to buy myself the materials i need for a project, but id at least still have you guys here.

now ill be honest, ill still be able to come here sometimes, but most of the time itll be brief, so dont count on me staying. this also means no drawings for awhile......as if i already arent stressed enough. so any art trades i owe will have to wait......im sorry.

you know.............................i swear im closer than ever to either just end everything rn (su*c*de) or just run off and change my identity. i promise these wont happen....probably. im just feeling empty and unwanted.....by the same person I GAVE A FUCKING DAY TO!!!!" (aka mothers day)

idk.....like i said im just uneasy rn....unless she changes her mind or shows me that she didnt mean what she said....ill feel better. as for the devices.....my guess is she'll forget in a week or two to keep em from me.

dont worry about me guys......i'll be alright......i hope......im already deeper in my grave atm......just need to be whacked with a shovel and thats it.........i doubt itll happen.

(peeps who need to know: Supersprite65 Revy-Husley Artlessman64 The-Scarf-Husky Noxyhellish (and also tell the others guys)


© 2017 - 2024 ZachMFKAttack
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HannahArtistic's avatar
You think that suicide is going to help? It's not, I read the whole thing and understand how you feel. But listen, if you give yourself suicide, your loved ones are going to miss you, your parents, friends, and fans on the internet. Or running away, that's not good either.  Look I'm gonna be honest here and I want you to remember this. (( even someone else out there too who thinks of suicide))  "You" still have a 'lot' to live for in the future. Sure there still might be somedays that you might fall and scrape your knee or have a wound  on your body, but if you remember your mistakes, giving yourself sometime or anything like that, your wounds will become scabs. I'd promise you you'll feel better. 


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